Whiskey-Eyed Woman (Soldiering On Book 5) Read online

  For her part, Mandy could barely take her gaze off his broad, muscular chest, even as she studied the shallow wounds that marred all that perfection. Her cheeks heated, and the prickling at the back of her neck told her that he still hadn’t looked away.

  She cleared her throat. “I don’t think you need any stitches,” she informed him. “But that’s an inexpert opinion.”

  “I’ll take it,” he told her.

  Mandy took out some Band-Aids from the first aid kit next to her and began applying them as carefully as she could. “How did you get them?” she asked, tracing the edge of one of the cuts. “They don’t look like bullet wounds.”

  “Shrapnel,” he told her, his stomach muscles jumping under her touch. “When the bullets went flying, so did everything else. I got hit a couple of times.”

  She finally raised her gaze to meet his. “I’m grateful it wasn’t worse,” she told him, a fierce gladness that he’d survived welling up within her. She didn’t know what she’d do without him.

  He swallowed thickly. “Me too,” he told her. “If I wasn’t there to get you out of that car…”

  She huffed out a laugh. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad you rescued me. But I’m also glad you’re alive, just because I’m glad you’re not dead.”

  His lips quirked up in a smile, but his eyes grew intense. “I’m glad you’re not dead, too.”

  She leaned forward to kiss him, test him now this awkwardness pushed between them, but Duncan gripped her shoulders to stop her. Her heart sank.

  “Back to this again, are we?” Bitterness laced her tone.

  He exhaled. “Eventually you’ll realise we won’t work together.”

  She narrowed her eyes, fury rushing through her. “And why is that?” she asked, applying a Band-Aid with a little more force than necessary, making Duncan wince. “Why do you keep saying that? We’ve already proven we can work pretty damn well together.” She gestured towards the bathroom.

  His jaw worked. Instead of answering, he turned away and sighed. “Did I ever tell you I was engaged once?”

  Mandy’s jaw almost dropped from the change in subject. “To be married?” she squeaked out. An inkling of what Duncan might reveal hovered on the edge of her consciousness. Perhaps this would explain everything.

  He smiled an unpleasant smile. “Yeah, to be married.”

  “What happened?”

  He was silent for a long while, watching his own fingers as they made a pattern on the bedspread.

  “She dumped me, soon after I got home with my injured leg.”

  Mandy gasped. “She didn’t!”

  He nodded. “She told me I couldn’t give her the things she was used to. She was already sacrificing so much by marrying a poor man, and she didn’t want a broken one, too.” He paused. “She was a lot like you. Rich. Beautiful.” His eyes flickered to her, then back to his fingers. Despite her anger, Mandy warmed at the compliment.

  “You know I’m not her, though, right?”

  He tilted his head. “I know. But the thing is, she was right.”

  “But how could she be right? She sounds awful.”

  He shrugged. “Maybe she was. I was blind to her faults, so I can’t tell you with any accuracy. I loved her, and she loved me. But that wasn’t enough. Maybe at first she only dated me to rebel against her rich parents, but it definitely became more than that.” He said it lightly, but Mandy could sense the pain behind his words.

  “So, it didn’t work out with one woman and the rest of us are tarred with the same brush? That’s hardly fair.”

  He shook his head. “No, it’s not that. I mean, yes I haven’t been in a relationship since her. But it isn’t because I think all women will hurt me.”

  “Then what? What does it have to do with me?”

  He tilted his head, considering the question. “We were from two such different worlds. I was so far from what she was used to. She’d want me to take her to a fancy restaurant and I’d have to tell her I couldn’t afford it. She’d offer to pay instead, and it just never felt right. Never felt equal. Those moments became more frequent as time went on.”

  “But that’s all minor stuff, right?”

  He scoffed. “Maybe to you, considering you’re the one with the money. But I had to make the choice between letting a woman I loved paying for everything we did, or taking her down to my level so I could afford it.”

  “I’m sure she didn’t see it that way.”

  “Maybe not at first. But it poisoned what we had. It sat there between us like an elephant in the room, eating away at our love and affection.”

  “It can’t have been like that all the time though?” Mandy grasped at straws. It was so clear now why he didn’t think they’d work as a couple. His heart had been broken once before by money and class differences, and he wasn’t ready to risk himself again.

  But surely if two people cared about each other enough, then all those things wouldn’t matter so much?

  He shook his head. “Of course not. It was better when we stayed at home together. But when we were out in the world, I could see how I didn’t fit in. The way people looked at me. I’m Black, I wasn’t comfortable in a tux, or talking about urbane matters with her friends. She was used to expensive restaurants and nice clothes. She used money to solve her problems.” His gaze flickered up to hers and held it for a brief second before skittering away again. She understood now.

  “And that’s how you see me?” she asked softly.

  He shrugged. “Yes. Maybe. You do dress nicely, and attend fancy functions, and sometimes throw money around like it means nothing. But that’s not me. I can’t be like that, be comfortable with it. I grew up in a military family, and for a long time my parents barely made ends meet. Even now, I’m not well-off.”

  Duncan was no longer that man. He was her equal—a successful business owner, just as she was. He wasn’t the poor, rough, military man he still obviously thought himself as.

  “But Duncan, that’s—“

  He cut her off. “But it matters. We’re from two different worlds. I won’t ever want to attend those fancy events. I’d go, but I’d resent it. That kind of things can fester between two people.”

  “But I’d never make you go if you didn’t want to. I don’t even like those events, I just go because I know they’re necessary.”

  He gave her a disbelieving look. “You wouldn’t make me go, like you didn’t make me go to the charity auction before Christmas.”

  She blushed hotly. “Okay, fine. But you still wouldn’t have to come.”

  “And leave you to be hit on by all the handsome, rich men that would swarm around you? I couldn’t do that, either.”

  “So, that’s it? You don’t want to go to fancy events, so we can never be together? Those things are rare, you know.”

  He shook his head. “It’s not just that. Your father has made it clear he hates me.”

  “Well right now, I’m not too fond of him, either.”

  “But he’s still family. And you’ll probably make up one day—which will be easier if I’m not in the picture.”

  “Easier, yes, but not impossible.”

  “These things add up, Mandy. All the not-quite-impossibles will be burdens on you, each one dragging you further down.”

  She leaned forward. “But life—relationships—are never easy. I’ve dated rich men, but they’ve all had their own ‘burdens’ as you call it. Nothing will ever be smooth sailing.”

  “I won’t be that guy, Mandy. I won’t make your life harder. You deserve so much better.”

  Anger flared at his defeatist attitude. “How about you let me decide that, hmmm? You’re so determined to make decisions for me, thinking you know best. Well, fuck that and fuck you.” His eyes widened at her profanity, but she didn’t stop. “I’m a grown woman. And when you’re not being an overbearing asshole, like now, I like you. I think we’d make a good team. But I won’t beg. I deserve better than to prostrate myself before a man that
doesn’t want me back. But know this. I think you’re wrong. And I think you’re so wrong, and so stubborn, that it’s turning you into an asshole.”

  He blinked. “An asshole.”

  “Yes. An asshole. And if you’d quit wallowing in your own misery for a second, you’d see it. Get over yourself and accept we should at least give this thing a try between us.”

  He was silent for a long moment. “I can’t. Not when I know it’ll end in tears—probably mine.” He gave a mocking quirk to his lips.

  Mandy huffed out a breath. “Fine. But I think that’s all just excuses. You’re afraid. You’re afraid of getting hurt again. You’re afraid to admit that we’re equals. I live off my salary from Soldiering On, just like you do. The rest goes to charity.”

  She paused, but he still didn’t respond. She huffed. “If you really wanted to try this, then you’d find a way. In fact, you’d probably discover it was easy.”

  With that, she stood and gathered the first aid kit together.

  “Mandy…” he said apologetically, reaching a hand towards her. She stepped back out of reach, despite longing to go to him.

  “No. I’m done. I won’t keep embarrassing myself by pursuing this. I’m over it. I’m over you.”

  She stormed out of the room and replaced the first aid kit in the hall closet with more violence than the case warranted. After that, anger still not abated, she went into the kitchen and slammed around some pots and pans as she threw together something to eat. She didn’t share with Duncan, not in the mood to talk to him, to be subject to his calm, unwavering gaze as he made it clear he didn’t know or understand her at all, despite their years of friendship and working together.

  She’d had enough of men in her life failing to see the real her. She’d worked side by side with her father for years before she’d seen that he had no idea who she was and what she wanted. She’d joined his company with the intention of heading up a world-class CSR—Corporate Social Responsibility—division. She’d made a plan to implement it, saving the company money while still helping the environment and social causes. He’d approved the new plan, much to her delight, and then given it to her colleague to implement and trying to move her into the corporate strategy division of the company to ‘reward’ her good work. She’d quit rather than accept his plan for her and started Soldiering On with Duncan.

  And now Duncan proved to be no better.

  No matter how many nights they’d spent together, relaxed and casual in his office—shoes off, eating cheap takeaway—he still saw her as this prissy, rich socialite from a different world.

  Yes, she knew how to use her money and social connections to get what she wanted. But that wasn’t who she really was. It was a front she put on. She’d thought Duncan would have realised that by now.

  But he was too stubborn to see beyond what he wanted to see.

  Having worked out her anger on the kitchen, Mandy glanced at the microwave clock to see it was in the very early hours of the morning. Exhaustion hit her hard and she sagged against the kitchen bench. Duncan had distracted her from the evening’s events, from how close she’d come to death, but now she trembled with the awareness that she’d almost died.

  Her legs unsteady, she slowly made her way to the bedroom, seeking comfort in the presence of the only other person nearby.

  Duncan still lay where she’d left him on his back, eyes closed. His broad chest expanded with each deep breath, and despite everything, a slow lick of yearning uncurled in her belly.

  She sighed and shuffled into the room. No way she’d sleep on that uncomfortable couch—alone—so Duncan would just have to deal with her sharing the bed. She slid in between the covers and comforted herself listening to the steady breathing of the man next to her.

  Duncan stared up at the ceiling, achingly aware of the sleeping woman beside him.

  He’d pretended to be asleep when he’d heard her stop messing about in the kitchen so he wouldn’t have to continue their conversation. Pathetic? Maybe. But he just needed time to think.

  Why had he told her all that stuff about Melanie? He hadn’t meant to. But he also knew he couldn’t resist Mandy for much longer, and the more she stayed away from him the easier it would be.

  If you really wanted to try this, then you’d find a way. Her words echoed in his mind. Was she right? Maybe he was just too scared to try. But even if she was right, he wasn’t wrong—they were from two different worlds. It wouldn’t be nearly as easy as she pretended.

  Duncan sighed and shifted on the bed, careful not to wake Mandy.

  It wasn’t really a good time to be pondering his relationship with his colleague. Not with a man like Tulane still out there, hunting them. Perhaps when all this blew over, his head would be clear enough to think this through properly.

  Then again, the danger they—Mandy—were currently in was another factor. If Mandy was still working for her father, in the world she’d grown up in and belonged to, would she have been kidnapped and nearly killed? Held hostage? All the other awful things that had happened to her?

  Unlikely.

  So even if Duncan decided they should pursue something, shouldn’t he refuse anyway? Just to keep her safe? Could he even stay away?

  There was no easy answer.

  He must have drifted off at some point, his thoughts swirling in an endless loop, because the next thing he knew he was awake and wrapped around Mandy.

  He knew instantly who it was. Some part of his brain had known precisely what it was doing when it made him curl closer, wrapping an arm around her. Their legs were tangled, as were their fingers, and Mandy’s deep breaths told him she was oblivious to the whole thing.

  Duncan paused for a moment, closed his eyes, and breathed her in. The scent of lavender wafted over him. She was so soft, so warm in his arms. A surge of protectiveness rose within him. She was so vulnerable, so apart from the hard life he’d lived in the army.

  Their differences were numerous, but he’d still dreamed of this moment. If he gave in—if he opened himself up to the heartbreak of a lifetime—this was how he might wake up every morning. His heart ached with a bone-deep yearning at the thought. The selfish part of him wanted this—wanted her, and the life they could build together—but there was a huge part of him, whether the logical or terrified part, he couldn’t be sure, that told him to run far and fast.

  Still, he didn’t leap away from her soft warmth. Instead, he shifted closer and tightened their fingers together where they rested over her stomach. She made a sound which vibrated through him and he stilled, watchful as a predator as he waited to see whether she’d awaken.

  Instead, she sighed and pressed deeper into her pillow, into him, and fell back asleep.

  Knowing he’d chanced it long enough, Duncan slowly shifted back on the mattress, disentangling their fingers as he went. She made a sound of protest, but still didn’t wake up, and Duncan had a moment of unexpected disappointment before he finally gained his feet and left the room.

  Chapter 16

  Early afternoon sun streamed through the blinds in Zack’s living room. Empty pizza boxes littered the table, fighting for space with endless pages of relevant information about Tulane, his empire, his properties…anything they thought might be useful in finding him and bringing him down.

  The more information they had on his nefarious activities, the smoother his trial would go for Hannah.

  “If I were an evil billionaire, where would I hide?” Destiny mused.

  Hannah knocked her elbow into Destiny’s side. “My underground lair, obviously,” she joked. Destiny glanced up and shared a look of amusement with Hannah that made her stomach tumble pleasantly.

  Zack snorted. “Are you sure you aren’t talking about Batman?”

  Destiny and Hannah both laughed, but their smiles died as they realised they were no closer to finding Tulane. The three of them went back to sorting through the information, desperate to find the smoking gun that would lead the police straight to Tulane
’s doorstep.

  The three properties he owned had all been checked by police and cleared. He was hiding elsewhere.

  Blake rounded the corner of the kitchen bench, moving through the open plan space, chewing on a carrot. He flicked open the lids of a few pizza boxes and grunted when he found them empty.

  “Anything yet?” he asked.

  Zack shook his head. “Same old stuff. Did you have any luck getting anything out of his staff?”

  Blake shook his head and made a face. “Totally tight lipped.”

  Destiny raised her brows. “You’re losing your charm,” she teased.

  He narrowed his eyes at her. “Or maybe I’m just saving it for one woman.” He raised his gaze, landing on Sierra where she browsed through Zack’s books. At his gaze she glanced up and their eyes met, a soft smiling curling both their lips. A smile that spoke of intimacy and shared connection.

  Another throb of envy beat in Destiny’s chest. She wanted that. A relationship that spoke without words.

  The ring of the doorbell startled them all.

  “I’ll get it,” Destiny offered, if only to get away from the irritating envy she felt at Blake and Sierra’s open affection for each other.

  “Maybe Sam’s back?” Blake suggested doubtfully. She and Cameron had gone to interview employees at Beaton security to see if any of them knew more about Tulane than they’d volunteered to the cops. A big job, but one they were best suited to—Cameron being the former CEO, and Sam having worked there briefly.

  But it wasn’t Sam. Paul waited on the doorstep, Christine beside him.

  Destiny opened the door wide so he could wheel through. “We didn’t expect you. Thought you wanted to stay with all your fancy machines.”

  Paul shrugged, his face tinting red. “I didn’t want to miss out on all the action.”

  Everyone chuckled. Christine nudged Paul’s shoulder and he glanced around.

  “Besides,” he said. “I might have found something.”

  The room went still with anticipation. Paul cleared his throat, then slowly wheeled over to the table. Destiny followed him, and they all took positions around the edge as they waited for his news.